You insist on asking every celebrity who steps of an aircraft what they think of Australia. You take pride in living in a tolerant multicultural society but firmly believe that all Poms and Kiwis are fair game. 'Fair go for all' excludes indigenous people.Īn eight-hour trip to go camping for the weekend isn't out of the question or excessive. Our mantras are 'fair go for all', 'mateship' and 'little Aussie battler' - but we still publicly condemn those with different viewpoints to us. Your politicians believe than sticking the prefix 'un' in front of your nationality is an effective way of making you sit down and shut up. The big national sporting events are men-only. The blokes at the local gym think your weight training is an opportunity to ask you out on a date. The "Aussie Aussie Aussie! Oi oi oi!" chant has been a religious experience in the past. Your cooking apron has plastic breasts on it. And then you place 'bloody' in front of it when you really mean it. You've ever used the words - grouse, tops, ripper, choice, sick, rad, exo, ace, wicked, ballistic - to mean good. Your soap stars become pop singers and move to the UK. You know all the words to Khe Sahn but not the national anthem.
You make kooky films, sometimes about wayward road trips (across the outback preferably). You favour either Holden or Ford - or a souped-up WRX with new kit and a bootful of subwoofer.ĭriving down the main street/beach road playing bad techno is your idea of a perfect Saturday night / Sunday arvo. You can compress several words into one - ie 'g'day', 'd'reckn?' This allows for more space for profanities. You love, adore and admire a particular team/sportstar/actor on a winning streak - until they lose. The only thing better than beating the Pohms at ANY sport is giving them shit for it. You don't drink Fosters, but you let the world think you do.
#Persona be your true game livejournal tv
After all, what else gives you an excuse to sit on your arse for five days, watch TV and sink piss with your mates? You relish test cricket - the longest, slowest game in sport (and that's not even counting the replays). You think footballers dressing up in drag on TV is funny (but your son being gay isn't).
Your most offensive curse also doubles as an exclamation of awe or amazement, like, "fark orf!"Īll of your internationally famous people don't live here. The term "musical instrument" also extends to wobbly bits of ply-wood, hand saws, gum leafs and combs. The closest you ever got to going overseas was your packet of 5 Days In Rio grundies. Your idea of a lethal weapon is a slug gun. You think Tall Poppy Syndrome is a national condition.ĭemocracy means the freedom to draw caricatures of John Howard. You actively dislike Americans, but watch their TV, eat their food and worship their idols. You feel obliged to spread salty black stuff that looks like congealed motor oil on bread and actually grow to like it.
You're wearing a cap emblazoned with 'Get A Dog Up Ya.' You don't actually use the words 'sheila' or 'shrimp'. The Greeks and Mexicans next door ask you over to have a barbeque. The community is so concerned over the fact that muslim women can't use public swimming pools because there are men present that they have female-only periods. Your next door neighbours can be from Tunisia, Israel, Indonesia, Japan, Zimbabwe, Iraq, Brazil, Spain, Malaysia.
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